Ho ho ho

I was not the worst Santa ever.

That's what one customer told me at PetSmart today. Apparently, the Santa at the PetSmart in Wisconsin wasn't very good.

The Santa outfit fit reasonably well. The belt was a joke, however. It was definitely made for someone larger than a size-32 waist. My two "elves" didn't like the look of a skinny Santa, so they stuffed a couple of pet beds up my shirt before we got started. Problem solved!

There was one lady who stood out from the rest this afternoon. Her dog's name was Bella, short for Isabella. (As opposed to the other dog named Bella, presumably after the chick from the Twilight series because of the age of her owner.) Bella's mommie was bat-shit crazy. Certifiable. As in, makes me weep for the future of the human race.

Bella was wearing her Christmas outfit, which, I'll admit, isn't so insane. She's had her photo taken with Santa since she was 4 months old. And she has even appeared on a magazine cover. Impressive! I should have said, "So have I!" I wouldn't have mentioned it was on the cover of Alaska Economic Trends, though, haha. Then again, I was Santa, not Brian. It's best I didn't say anything.

The crazy thing about this woman is that she came in for a reshoot. She had visited another PetSmart, but they took a portrait photo instead of one in landscape. Okay, we can fix that. But she took advantage of the situation, taking dozens of her own photos along with the ones taken by our photographers. She even brought her own dog-sized sled for Bella to sit in during the shoot.

And you should have heard her: "Bella, what's Santa going to bring you for Christmas? You just love Santa! Come on Bella, smile for me!" I had to put up with a half hour of this nonsense. The scary thing is that without her dog, she would appear to be completely sane. There wasn't anything wacky about her appearance. The crazies are blending in with the general population!

Besides her, the afternoon was surprisingly uneventful. I'd say at least half of the shots were multi-pet photos. And each time, I thought to myself, "Uhhh, how is this going to work?" The problem was that because of the pet beds up my shirt, I couldn't move around too much for fear of losing my gut. And those damn beds were HOT. I was sweating to death. But my mental mantra was, "It's for a good cause. It's for a good cause."

But it was fun! The photos turned out well. There were no allergic reactions. All of the customers seemed pleased. And, most importantly, my dampness was due to sweat and not cat piss. A good day.

feeling good

I'm almost done. My paper on the Indian Gaming Regulatory Act, my last project for the semester, is 99-percent done. I just need a few more citations. And the presentation looks good. It will be highlighted with photos from the rez. I'm billing it as a combination of breaking stereotypes about Indian casinos and "Here's what I did on my summer vacation."

I don't know what I'm going to do with myself after Friday. Besides those citations, I didn't have any project work that needed to get done this evening. (Hence, this blog post.) And it feels weird. But I deserve the break. Plus, one of the professors I'll have next semester already sent out an e-mail about what to expect in January. Good grief. Like I'm even thinking about that.

***

A while back, I went to an orientation at the Humane Society to see about volunteering. My intention was to go over to walk dogs once a week. I like dogs and miss not having one. I only went twice before school took over my life. In that short amount of time, you should have seen the number of dogs I let escape from their cages to run free through the kennel.

But I'm making up for it on Sunday as I play Santa Claus at a local pet store. Yes, I'll be dressed in the whole Santa suit as I sit for photos with dogs, cats, and whatever other pets folks bring in. I wonder what the weirdest pet will be? I'm just hoping not to get pissed on. The afternoon's comedic potential is quite high. This could be one of the funniest things I've ever done. Stay tuned.

***

I finally kicked my running back into gear. Thankfully, we've had a warm, dry spell (temps in the 40s), so the snow line has moved way up the foothills. That means the trails are mostly clear. I really shouldn't go so long without running. And running on the paved Greenbelt just doesn't do it for me.

Speaking of running, I've pretty much decided I'm going to try my first ultra-marathon next summer. I think I can do it. I'm going to shoot for a 50-miler before deciding whether I can do a full 100 miles one day. There's a race in the Bay Area in July that I'm currently targeting. I need a big goal outside of school to work toward.

bullets of consciousness

• One class down, two more to go. There's still much work to be done, though, before I can celebrate. But I'm loving my end-of-semester projects. I'm going to try to save the world until the professor tells me to stop.
• Two weeks from today, the semester will be over and I can turn my brain off for a month. Just before Christmas, I commence my two-and-a-half-week road trip extravaganza without a care in the world.
• I'm spending Christmas with family in Arizona. I'm really looking forward to it.
• I saw 127 Hours tonight. It was just the pick-me-up I needed after a long week. Right.
• When I visit Canyonlands in a couple weeks, I promise to let someone know where I'm going first.
• We received about eight inches of snow earlier this week. Nothing major and it wasn't cold. But the street plowing here is non-existent.
• It's supposed to be sunny in Mission for the next week. I'm jealous.
• I haven't been running much and I'm not happy about it. I can't wait to catch up while I'm out of town later this month.
• I continue to dupe others (and myself) into thinking I'm fit for a long-term relationship. The carnage mounts.
• It'll be interesting what jobs are available in early 2012. Looking at what's been posted recently, there are some opportunities I would jump at.
• I still think I have one last move in me. And that's it. The next place had better be good.
• I'm not staying in Boise.
• I went to the dentist this morning. Is it just me, or are they continuing to invent more and more fancy gadgets and tools solely to find things that might be wrong with your teeth? And since when did the hygienist start hawking different products and services while you're having your teeth cleaned?
• I did like having the TV up on the ceiling to watch while the hygienist blasted the tartar from my teeth.
• I signed myself up for an interesting volunteer commitment in a couple weeks. I'll keep it under my hat for now, but it has the makings of a pretty funny experience. I'm such a giver.
• I've retyped this last bullet several times, then erased it. Best to keep some things to myself. It's been a weird week.